1. WOMEN…..BEFORE APPROACHING MEN

    Modern dating has made it possible for the woman to be just as bold in her pursuits of her male interest. When I started this blog, it was all about perfecting men’s dating skills, however, the number of women who’ve been querying how to get so-and-so guy is overwhelming. So I decided to write this simple piece to address the single woman and her dating options as she approaches men. While the direct and indirect approaches are more tailored towards the male pursuit strategy, most women usually employ one of the following roles in attracting men:

    1.      The Huntress

    2.      The Seductress

    3.      The Damsel in Distress

    4.      Coy & Shy

    5.      Victorian Woman

          

    1.HUNTRESS

    The Huntress is on the prowl for some game and the male remains her prize hunt. She’s bold and fierce in her relentless pursuit of you, and if for the night,cue in the one-night-stands or friends with benefits.

    2.THE SEDUCTRESS

    The Seductress assumes the role of the coquette; she’s flirty and is aware of her amorous intent, as she lures the male into her lair. Cue in some philandering and flings.

    3.DAMSEL IN DISTRESS

    She’s ultra-feminine and playing lost, but here comes the man to her rescue! Naturally all males like to play Superman to this Lois Lane.  The damsel-in-distress card works in drawing the attention of many men, but for how long? The answer is inconclusive.

    4.COY& SHY

    She avails herself to endless possibilities once the man has made the first move. This modest woman still indirectly communicates her interest in guys, but in a rather subtle tone- she’s the antithesis of the huntress. Cue in the possibilities of long-term relationships.

    5.VICTORIAN WOMAN

    She embodies the classic courtship role, where the man has to woo her over the course of time. The man invests ample amount of time and resources, be it financial, emotional etc to earn the attention and affection of this woman. Cue in long-term relationships.

     To be continued……

  2. THE MODERN & SINGLE WOMAN

    THE SINGLE WOMAN

    With the conclusion of the excerpts from my impending book, Boy Meets Girl Phenomenon, I’ve been pondering for weeks now on how to maintain the content of this blog under a new premise. Bearing in mind that all the articles I’ve written thus far are from a male perspective, while engaged in other writing endeavours, it hit me-a personal Eureka moment- the direction to steer my blog from here on out. With over a year’s worth of articles addressing the majority of male audience on how to better their interactions with women, the time has finally come to shift the focus onto women.

    My weekly postings have captured modern dating for the male and how to excel amid all its nuances and nuisances.  Basically, boy meets girl, who’s now matured into a man and meets the woman of his interest- that is the premise I spoke of earlier. Said woman is particularly single and has not been spoken for, she’s free and unattached in any relationships at all. Single and ready to mingle, she belongs to a special class and cohort of women- the 17 to late twenty-something. Marriage is not her priority at this juncture and neither is any long-term courtship and relationship right from the jump. She’s a career woman who craves her independence as much as the company of an equally or even more ambitious partner. Whatever her interest, the point is, she remains at the helm of her choices as to who she deals with. Open to some dating experiences with a select few men just before a serious marriage prospect comes along, she’s all for something new and daring with a man of her choosing.

    Today’s woman is more powerful than she’s ever been and possesses the choice of  whom she dates, casually intimate with, or enters into some friends with benefits arrangement- the underside of modern dating. Whatever the case, she’s fully immersed into the dating scene and playing the coquette role to a tee, as if she were under the tutelage of Cleopatra herself. Much like the versed male dater, today’s woman is not sheepishly giving into her whims with her male interest. So, for the single woman trying her hand at dating, and looking for quality male prospects, not the run-of-the-mill kind, this blog now speaks for you. Yes, the more date-smart you are, the less heartbreaks and ugly frogs you have to kiss before prince charming walks into your life. I’ll be addressing your concerns and ushering you into dating success. Stay tuned as I keep you up to speed with the new modern dating structure. To all the begrudged women, sick of getting played by less-than-stellar male interests, it’s time for another dating attempt. This time, however, you’ll get it right only if you’re date-smart. The choice is again, in your hands….

  3. PICKUP vs. INTERACTIONS with women

    Dating Impression Management Series

    PICKUP vs INTERACTIONS

    The Boy Meets Girl Phenomenon, as the name suggests, takes on the series of fortunate events once the boy meets the girl, and in effect, as the man meets the woman. Since its inception over a year ago, the articles presented- from a male perspective- gives insight to the working knowledge of the interactions assumed in being a successful dater in the finicky modern dating world. This is a dating blog to enhance your social life and in turn, your skill with women. It has absolutely no ties with picking up “chicks”, but in bettering your social interactions and dating success with “women”. Please note the difference. Also, the views expressed on this site are completely detached from the hackneyed pickup strategies.

            

    There are tons of pickup materials and resources by so-called world-class seducers who are able to charm any woman into bed, yet the dating scene is replete with begrudged women. Yes, they claim anyone can possess the ability to attract the finest women regardless of one’s financial stature and social standing- o the grandiose delusions of pickup. Actually being financially attractive places one in a favourable position with most women right off the bat, but that’s a different song altogether. In any case, The Mystery Method, The Game and Magic Bullets are regarded as the canonical texts of seduction and its contents promised to drastically change your dating resume. Picking up “chicks” is all very well and has its advantages of ridding any fear anxiety you have in approaching women. Over the long haul, the pickup mentality proves to be mechanical and absolutely void of that natural allure of genuine interactions, and this is where my blog and my impending book BOY MEETS GIRL PHENOMENON excels.  Discussed in-depth are new and modern ways of being adept with today’s woman, who’s tired of being approached by guys with intents of “picking her up”. Women, the great intuits that they are, can sense that fake confidence miles away and are instantly turned off by the drudgery that pickup entails. Silly pickup routines have no footing here, and a personalized dating style, tailored to your own personality is what is preached here.

               

    The next array of articles to follow will incorporate a feminine touch, in veering away from the selfish intents of pursuits and conquests. Geared towards the single lady who’s venturing into the dating scene and the serial female dater, this blog will present to you how to flourish in the modern dating world with your recently acquainted male interests. Welcome!

  4. MYSTERY vs. PREDICTABILITY

    Continuing the series of Dating Impression management, this next subject is what separates the versed dater from the eager rookie.

    MYSTERY vs. PREDICTABILITY

    Revealing all your cards too soon in the high stakes and game of modern dating usually leads into unsightly losses. There’s absolutely no need to rush your approach and advances with any woman. It’s always best to keep an aura of mystery and intrigue about you, as both serve as powerful attractors in sustaining her attraction for you. Spice things up every now and then! The attention span of the modern woman, especially influenced by modern media is at an all-time low. Soon as boredom sets in, she’s looking to Twitter, Facebook, BBM, email and other online dating avenues to keep herself entertained.

    Yes, I know it’s exciting after having met a gorgeous woman - who’s showing interest in you-  to bare your guts in a fit of romance, all in the name of “getting to know each other better”. But today’s dating scene is counter-intuitive to this oversaturation of information in such a short span. Keep your autobiography to yourself, at least for now! Emotional intelligence, again surfaces as the most important trait of the skilled modern dater, who knows when to be hold the horses and when to let loose. Speaking of clichés, it’s often said that predictability is the mother of all boredom, in that sense, avoid patterns and routines with women. Tease and engage her in some banter just to keep her on her toes, be fun! Uncertainty and unpredictability are great in enhancing her attraction levels for you. If she’s used to certain communication patterns with you, switch it up every now and then. The unknown is always thrilling!!!

    Keep her guessing when you feel things coming to a stalemate, seeing as a little bit of mystery pans out in the long haul. By piquing her interest especially when it seems to wane, you keep her on the edge at all times.  A candid quote I live by is: “confusion is attraction”. Don’t be so hell-bent on attracting a woman in a mechanical and robotic way( the pickup way), that you lose sight of the naturally fun side of genuine interactions. This quote captures the essence of intrigue and its role in keeping things always lively between you and the interested woman. When it comes to 21st century dating success, anything but the norm! More to come….

  5. DISCRETION (Confidence) vs. BRAVADO (Cockiness)

    A quote that has always resonated with me since I came across it, goes along the lines of: “A good lover is a discreet lover”. Take a minute to let this sink in, as this segment speaks on why it’s important to maintain some privacy about your goings-on with women. While your reputation as a notorious philanderer and player usually draws in more women, the particulars of those women need to be guarded. By sharing intimate details of your sexual encounters outside of your confidantes, it presents issues of likely irreparable reputational damage and worries for the implicated women. Not even the most sexually liberal and promiscuous woman wants to be portrayed negatively in public. For this very reason, your sexual discretion with women is CRUCIAL.

    By being discreet before and after sex, it shows your respect for her privacy and reputation. Also, for newer prospects, it’s refreshing knowing they can fully explore their sexual depths with you, without worries their names will be out in the streets. No one wants their dirty laundry aired in public, especially hers; keep it just between you two.

                             

    Bravado easily branches off into arrogance, pretentiousness and outright cockiness, which could be a turn off for most women, under the wrong context. Although it’s common for most men to revel in their sexual accomplishments and conquests, it is just as important to exercise discretion in keeping the identities of these women undisclosed. To be discreet, is also to be non-judgmental of her before and especially after sex. Women naturally worry about their reputation and your perception of them post-sex; however, with your discretion and respect for their privacy, it wards off their worries. In the event of a breakup, regardless of the status quo between you and a former lover/ex, friends with benefits, etc., it sends the wrong message if you air out sordid details of your intimate times with her. It’s just plain vulgar. Remember the no “ex”plicit talk bit in previous articles? That subject fits perfectly with the theme of this piece. While some women are drawn to overt and gaudy displays of sexual prowess, be respectful of their sexual privacy. It pays to be discreet!

    Next week, we tackle the next subject on the Dating Impression Management series. Stay tuned.

About me

Dating Columnist and Prospective Author of Boy Meets Girl Phenomenon. A graduated pupil of Psychology and eternal student of Love Frederick Tuffour

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